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Groaners - post yours here

My son glued himself to his driver’s manual.
I’m glad he decided to adhere to the rules.
 
hairy potter.jpg
 
Clem and Slim find 3 hand grenades in their cattle pasture. They decide to turn them in to the local sheriff.
Clem: "What if one blows up before we get there?"
Slim: "Then we lie and say we only found two!"
 
Jim-Bob stopped Billy-Bob at the general store and said, "You need to close your curtains the next time you and the missus are gettin' intimate, Billy-Bob. The whole town was watching and laughing at you yesterday."

Billy-Bob replied, "Joke's on y'all, I wasn't even home yesterday!"
 
Reminds me of my first apartment, used to be this lady across the driveway in the other building, would sit each evening in the window, with her mirror and lines of cocaine. I always thought that was a "draw the curtains" type thing..
 
Jim-Bob stopped Billy-Bob at the general store and said, "You need to close your curtains the next time you and the missus are gettin' intimate, Billy-Bob. The whole town was watching and laughing at you yesterday."

Billy-Bob replied, "Joke's on y'all, I wasn't even home yesterday!"
At his wedding, Jim-Bob went looking for his new bride. Opening the door to their bedroom, he found her and Billy Bob "in the act". He quietly shut the door and went downstairs to the reception. "Hey everybody, be quiet and follow me." Everyone quietly followed him up to the bedroom. Jim Bob opened the door and said "Look everyone! Billy Bob is so drunk, he thinks he's me!"
 
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