Groaners - post yours here

[Gliderman8]

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I could see that cumin.

 

[Basil]

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Did you steal that meme from the internet or is it Oregano?

 

[AngliaGT]

That's Sage advice.

 

[70herald]

I used a Pacesetter computerized photo typesetting machine…. No lead!
I bet very few people know what bell codes or kerning is.

Ok - I am pretty sure I know what both of them are
Kerning is simple - the adjustment of spacing between letters to make printing look good.
Bell codes (I think I am correct here) Dr Google wasn't much of a help in confirming what I think - the control codes used for most of the formatting information and probably called based on the actual bells which from telegraph days? The old teletype printing terminal at my fathers office in the university (my first hands on computer experience around 1980? ) had a literal bell in it which could be rung by the program to get the operators attention.
I remember as a kid being taken on a school field trip to see the local newspaper and their printing operation. Photo reproduction of the paper onto copper plates and then the huge printing press shooting out folded newspapers. As a kid with a fascination for anything mechanical I could have watched for hours. Probably 29 other kids + 1 teacher bored out of their minds!

 

[Gliderman8]

Ok - I am pretty sure I know what both of them are
Kerning is simple - the adjustment of spacing between letters to make printing look good.
Bell codes (I think I am correct here) Dr Google wasn't much of a help in confirming what I think - the control codes used for most of the formatting information and probably called based on the actual bells which from telegraph days? The old teletype printing terminal at my fathers office in the university (my first hands on computer experience around 1980? ) had a literal bell in it which could be rung by the program to get the operators attention.
I remember as a kid being taken on a school field trip to see the local newspaper and their printing operation. Photo reproduction of the paper onto copper plates and then the huge printing press shooting out folded newspapers. As a kid with a fascination for anything mechanical I could have watched for hours. Probably 29 other kids + 1 teacher bored out of their minds!

Your bell code explanation is spot on…. Ding, ding!
The computer code we used to input to the typesetter was always preceded by a bell code which contained the info for font, point size, line length, leading, and character spacing.
The bell code command on the screen was a holdover from when an actual bell was rung alerting the operator to make a change.

 

[DrEntropy]

Started my "career" as a newspaper photog, local hometown rag. Photo department also made the plates. Line-O-Type in the press room. That was about 1967. I can still conjure up the smell of ink and newsprint.

In the early '90's we decided to publish a monthly 16-page tab-sized paper, did it here in the hovel. Made a "darkroom" in a spare bedroom, and with 486/66 computers I'd built and what was kick-butt software at the time (Corel and Adobe). Did the paste-up "plates" on boards with a $canner, printer, Exact-o-Knives and rubber cement! Had it printed by a local firm. No bell codes but kerning was easily handled by the warez.

"You've come a long way, Baby!"

 

[NutmegCT]

ASCII forever!

 

[Gliderman8]

Started my "career" as a newspaper photog, local hometown rag. Photo department also made the plates. Line-O-Type in the press room. That was about 1967. I can still conjure up the smell of ink and newsprint.

In the early '90's we decided to publish a monthly 16-page tab-sized paper, did it here in the hovel. Made a "darkroom" in a spare bedroom, and with 486/66 computers I'd built and what was kick-butt software at the time (Corel and Adobe). Did the paste-up "plates" on boards with a $canner, printer, Exact-o-Knives and rubber cement! Had it printed by a local firm. No bell codes but kerning was easily handled by the warez.

"You've come a long way, Baby!"

Rubber cement?… I used wax so layouts could be repositioned. Also had a darkroom with large format vertical Nu-Arc camera.
An art that became a science.

 

[DrEntropy]

Rubber cement?… I used wax so layouts could be repositioned. Also had a darkroom with large format vertical Nu-Arc camera.
An art that became a science.

I lied... Glue sticks, repositionable.

Been a while. My excuse: I'm OLD.

 

[AngliaGT]

But Tom still calls you "Kid".

 

[Popeye]

Corel… there is something i haven’t heard in a while!!!

 

[equiprx]

Rubber cement?… I used wax so layouts could be repositioned. Also had a darkroom with large format vertical Nu-Arc camera.
An art that became a science.

I still have a Daige Speed Wax Coater.
Don't use it but if I was still doing graphic arts that's what I would use.

 

[DrEntropy]

I still have a Daige Speed Wax Coater.
Don't use it but if I was still doing graphic arts that's what I would use.

With a 16-page layout once a month, those sticks were about all we needed. ISTR they were a 3M product.

 

[Basil]

 

[AngliaGT]

And why did Mrs. Howell bring so many clothes?

 

[Basil]

And why did Mrs. Howell bring so many clothes?

I could ask my wife the same question when we go for a short trip.

 

[BobHaskell]

I could ask my wife the same question when we go for a short trip.

But you know better, don't you?

 

[Basil]

But you know better, don't you?

Yes. Yes I do.

 

[John Turney]

 

[Basil]

As you may know from the Bible, Joseph was a carpenter.
One spring day he's working in the wood shop & Jesus come in & says,
"Dad did you call me"? & Joseph says,
NO, I hit my thumb with a hammer!"