Copied from the Corvette site that I follow:
What do you call 2 monkeys that share an Amazon account? Prime mates.
Why don't vampires have any friends? Because they're a pain in the neck.
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.
A man walks into lawyer's office and asks, "How much for a consultation?" "Three questions for $150 bucks." "Kinda steep, isn't it?" "Yeah, now what's your last question."
I can't take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him. I guess that's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.
What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.