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Growing Old

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Basil said:
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife as she gazed at herself in the mirror.
With her birthday approaching, he asked what she’d like as a gift.
“I’d like to be eight again,” she replied, still staring at the mirror.
On the morning of her birthday, he woke up early, prepared a big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her to Adventure World theme park.
What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything available.
Five hours later, they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was spinning, and her stomach was upside down.
Next, he took her to McDonald’s, where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.
Then it was off to the movie theater for the latest superhero saga, complete with popcorn, soda, and her favorite candy, M&Ms.
What a fabulous adventure!
Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed, utterly exhausted.
He leaned over her with a big smile and lovingly asked, “Well, dear, what was it like being eight again?”
Her eyes slowly opened, and her expression suddenly changed.
"I meant my dress size, you idiot!!!”
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he's going to get it wrong.
Click to expand...
Every single time.
 
IMG_9016.jpeg
 
Basil said:
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife as she gazed at herself in the mirror.
With her birthday approaching, he asked what she’d like as a gift.
“I’d like to be eight again,” she replied, still staring at the mirror.
On the morning of her birthday, he woke up early, prepared a big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her to Adventure World theme park.
What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything available.
Five hours later, they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was spinning, and her stomach was upside down.
Next, he took her to McDonald’s, where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.
Then it was off to the movie theater for the latest superhero saga, complete with popcorn, soda, and her favorite candy, M&Ms.
What a fabulous adventure!
Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed, utterly exhausted.
He leaned over her with a big smile and lovingly asked, “Well, dear, what was it like being eight again?”
Her eyes slowly opened, and her expression suddenly changed.
"I meant my dress size, you idiot!!!”
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he's going to get it wrong.
Click to expand...

My Wife says I never listen -









- at least I think that's what she says.
 
George Burns (in his 90's) once said:

"My Doctor told me if I wanted to live a long life I needed to quit smoking cigars, quit drinking and quite chasing women. My doctor died 20 years ago"


Rod
 
Rod-H said:
George Burns (in his 90's) once said:

"My Doctor told me if I wanted to live a long life I needed to quit smoking cigars, quit drinking and quite chasing women. My doctor died 20 years ago"


Rod
Click to expand...
I did know a fellow who had a heart attack and was told in the hospital that he needed to reduce his stress - He literally did go home and divorce his wife. Never exactly sure that that was the stress the doctor was referring to, (I think he married his mistress)

I will say I have rarely met anyone who was so much a heart attack waiting to happen. sheesh.
 
I tell people that if I get too full of myself,I talk to my Wife,
who reminds me that THAT great.
I'm still trying to nod my head & smile,rather than opening
my mouth & getting myself into trouble.
 
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