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This is supposed to be satire

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That's what it is. That's what Babylonbee does - similar to the Onion. Some will see the humor, some won't. Not unlike what passes for comedy on most late night shows these days (God I miss Johnny)
 
I have one niece over in eastern NY already going stir-crazy. 15, competitive Irish dancer who competes most weekends and trains at a studio 3-4 nights a week besides being a high school freshman. Been doing that, and pushing herself since she was a little kid. Driving her up the wall already to only be able to practice at home and not work with her teacher or have contests to go to. The downside to being so totally self driven as she is.
 
Haha! Too close to reality.
 
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