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Test for Dementia

JMC

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TEST FOR DEMENTIA... Try NOT to look at the answers. That WOULD be cheating! Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying; "If you don't use it, you will lose it," also applies to the brain, so..... below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence. Take the following test and determine if you are losing it or are still "with it."


OK, relax, clear your mind and....... begin.


1. What do you put in a toaster?




Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread," go to Question 2.


2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?




Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously over- stressed and may even overheat. It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more appropriate, such as Children's World." If you said "water," proceed to question 3


3. If a red house is made from red bricks, and a blue house is made from blue bricks, and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?




Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said, "green bricks," what the devil are you still doing reading these questions? If you said "glass," then go on to Question 4.


4. Twenty years ago, a plane was flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If you recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines failed. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the third engine fails before he has time to attempt an emergency landing, and the plane crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury the survivors? . . . in East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land"?




Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't bury the survivors," proceed to question 5.


5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60 of a degree every minute how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour?




Answer: One degree! If you said, "360 degrees" or anything other than "one degree," you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are obviously out of your league. Turn in your pencil, and exit the room.


Everyone else proceed to the final question.


6. Without using a calculator -- You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus, and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?




Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember? It was YOU!!


Now pass this along to all your "friends" and hope they do better then you did! You may have trouble getting to sleep quickly over the next three nights, but have faith. If you can't sleep, remember that your private talk with yourself is what is keeping you awake! Good night!
 
am an idolt not eno aswer wirght i tost my nind....
 
Managed to get them all except the cow one. so maybe I am only slightly demented.

Cheers,
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Walter
 
Given that this is a British board, I'm compelled to point out that in Blighty, a glass structure for growing plants indoors is called a glasshouse, and a green house would be a dwelling that is green.
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<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Eric:
Given that this is a British board, <hr></blockquote>
Thanks for pointing this out. I had not realized it until now. It explains a lot.
D
 
Being from good old blighty I've always called a glass house a green house, green or not! I don't consider myslelf strange in any way
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. However after completing the quiz above I think its time I got myself a zimmer frame and some checked furry slippers and prepare myself for the premature onset of galloping senility!

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[ 03-02-2004: Message edited by: catfood ]</p>
 
D@MN!! Got 'em all correct until the last one - forgot I was driving...oops, gotta wipe the drool off the edge of my lip and go nuzzy my binkie!
 
Eric: I work in a 45 acre "Greenhouse" Not a glass house. That sound old school British.
Zer ( Tomato Man )
 
<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Eric:
Given that this is a British board, I'm compelled to point out that in Blighty, a glass structure for growing plants indoors is called a glasshouse, and a green house would be a dwelling that is green.
wink.gif
<hr></blockquote>

I beg to differ, these structures are commonly sold as "greenhouses", refering to what must be one of, if not the largest UK chain of hardware & garden supplies vendors:

https://www.diy.com/diy/jsp/bq/category/category.jsp?CATID=183018

Calls them greenhouses.

All my British inlaws invariably refer to them as greenhouses. I've never heard such structures refered to as glasshouses, either. But then the language spoken within Britain does seem to vary far more than a casual observer might think....
 
All is lost! Creeping Americanisms! What's next - reliable cars?
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People who live and work in greenhouses should not throw stones er or is that? As you can tell I failed the test. My 12 year old daughter got 100% though. I'm in trouble boys BIG TROUBLE.jv
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<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Zer:
Eric: I work in a 45 acre "Greenhouse" Not a glass house. That sound old school British.
Zer ( Tomato Man )
<hr></blockquote>

Yes, but you're in Canada. There is (or was, until the UK gov't cut funding in 1995) the Glasshouse Crops Research Institute at Littlehampton UK, and all the scientific literature out of the UK refers to 'glasshouse' crops. Besides, I'm trying to wiggle out of my low score here.........
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Eric,

Its not the Americans, you are being assulted by the Canadians and the Scottish.

Cheers,
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Walter
 
You're right Walter - that's probably worse!
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As my daughter who is attending school in Canada says, we here in the good old USA speak American, not English. She is not sure what they speak in Canada, eh.
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<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by jv:
<<SNIP>> My 12 year old daughter got 100% though. I'm in trouble boys BIG TROUBLE.jv
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<hr></blockquote>

I think I’m in trouble too. I emailed the test to my mother as a birthday joke (she just turned 66). She got 100% correct while I missed two. Well technically it was three, but I don’t count the “Greenhouse” question.

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I got to the green house question and though, "well, what color it is would have no bearing on what it was made from. It could be green brick, green shingles, etc."

There's a difference between a greenhouse and a green house.
 
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