I just bought a Tap and Die set...

[Basil]

Today I bought a "Made in China" Tap and Die set from Harbor Freight. Its a good thing I already know how to properly use these tools because the instructions that came with the set wouldn't be of much help. Some actual excerpts from the instructions (stuff in parenthesis added by me):

1. "The inexperienced user should carefully read these instructions." (seemingly good advice)

2. "Drill correct hole size - Rater to drill size manoed on tap"

3. "Chamfer - File or gand bevel on end of rod to made proper starting easter."

4. "Start from proper side - The side with chemlered [beveted] threads is the starting side."
(I can't seem to figure out which side that is

)

5. "Check Hardness - Some work preces may be tempered or casa ha dened. Do not attompt to thread them A simptd test for pardness can be made with a fite if the work piere cannot be easity fited do not noceed as danage to lape and dies may result."
("casa ha dened?" Near as I can tell is Spanish for "You can't get back into your house

)

6. "Right Angle - the tap or aig must be startled at night (sneak up on it and yell BOO!

) angte must be maintained to assure sloaight acourate threads."

7. Safety Glasses - Toreign objects may be thrown into the eyes white using any cutting tool Always wear sately glasses or eye shetds during the use of cutting tools.

8. After securing the part being threaded, insert the die into the die stook and run tho sot sorow snugly into one of the recesses in the outside surface of the die." (Oh crud, I forgot to "run tho sot sorow snugly"

)

(This isn't made up - this was really from the instructions that came with my new T&D set).
Basil

 

[Guest]

that ain't funny that's sad.

 

[William]

I had a bad case of eye shetds when I was a kid. cleared up eventually, but the eye drops stank!
-William

 

[SilentUnicorn]

some how i dont think english was the authors first language

 

[tony barnhill]

Reads like some of my high school students' reports! & their folks get angry when I mark off for spelling, etc!...seems some folks think that if its turned in, it should get an 'A'

 

[Bugeye58]

I had a multimeter that was made in Japan, and the instruction sheet referred to the connection on one of the test leads as an "Alligator crip".
Come to think of it, when I snap the shutter on my Nikon, it goes "crick".
A friend sent me the instruction sheet for a Chinese floor jack that is equally as hilarious as the one for your die set. I'll have to see if I still have it, and post it.
I'd be careful using that set if I were you. You may never be able to get back in the house again!
Jeff

 

[Kevin Genoff]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by tony barnhill:

but, Basil, that would require paying salaries comperable with US union scale! Wasn't the very reason for going to those 3rd world countries to get lowered manufacturing coasts to increase profits? No politics!!

or better yet:

[ 08-08-2003: Message edited by: tony barnhill ]<hr></blockquote>

Actually though, Tony, Nissan was buying parts from us. I know whatcha mean though

 

[tony barnhill]

In the early days of our Nation's development before our education system solidified, many people spelled words as they spoke them...thus, lots of formal names are spelled differently (i.e., Brashers could be Brashiers or Brachers depending on the accent of the speaker)....&, many other words had different spellings because of that...unfortunately (I think), some school systems today stress 'spell as you say' as the way to start children off...
...so, as funny as these things seem, they're not without precedence!

 

[racing girl]

One of our racers races a really pretty little Datsun Roadster. These are acutual quotes from his workshop manual...

"This carburellor is designed to obtain a most optimum spray of mixed gases by combining fuel sucked in the engine and air in a most optimum ratio,by appropriatly combining adjusting parts."

"When washing with water,dynamo must be free from reckless pour of water."

"Next,remove the exhaust remove the manifold assembly from engine block upwards.Pipe from the manifold after taking off the shock absorber." ???

Anyone speak Engrish??
RG

[ 08-08-2003: Message edited by: racing girl ]</p>

 

[Basil]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by racing girl:
... must be free from reckless pour of water."

[ 08-08-2003: Message edited by: racing girl ]<hr></blockquote>

This also applies when giving my cat a bath

 

[Guest]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Basil:


This also applies when giving my cat a bath

<hr></blockquote>

I tried that. once.

 

[SilentUnicorn]

i dried my cat in a microwave....May She Rest in Peace

 

[PC]

I tried giving my cat a bath. I got too much hair stuck to my my tongue.

PC.

 

[Bret]

This is nothing – Try working in & around the Mexican USA Boarder like I do. You're forced to get really good at “Espanlish”.

But anyway - if the translated documentation really bothers you that much – I recommend watching more Jackie Chan movies.

It worked for me.

 

[Bugeye58]

In the same vein, here are some gems from a friends Hong Kong compressor guarantee card.

This is an excellent equipment with very few noise and excessive reliability.

Though unfragile, it is also robust, and should not be belted.

Circuit arrangements ensure environments and input current is best at both temperatures, including snow and hot.

Very heavy fuses are supplied in plenty.

Stability is too good on full battery and this should be lowered, but the input may be reduced to danger level if required.

The negative will be and the positive will not if supply polarity is incorrect, also, a humming noise will be introduced, together with smoke.

When setting up, the best angle has no smoke and slight smell.

For accessibility without vandalism use the many entrances but switch them all off afterwards and before.

When aligning, twiddle for strong current and prevent sparks.

The motor should be good for ever, but pregnant wear-out may occur after a few summers if heat is applied

Do not doubt the guarantee, it is backed by many years in Hong Kong without Odor, Patience or Threat.

Gee, I didn't know Lucas was building compressors now!!!!!
Jeff

[ 08-09-2003: Message edited by: Bugeye58 ]</p>

 

[Henri]

Chuck wrote...I tried that. once.

What getting or taking a bath?

 

[Guest]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Henri:
Chuck wrote...I tried that. once.

What getting or taking a bath?

<hr></blockquote>

that would be giving a cat a bath, took me a long time to heal

 

[SilentUnicorn]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Bugeye58:
In the same vein, here are some gems from a friends Hong Kong compressor guarantee card.


The negative will be and the positive will not if supply polarity is incorrect, also, a humming noise will be introduced, together with smoke.

<hr></blockquote>


sounds like this author Knew Lucas Personally

 

[Kevin Genoff]

My friend had a similar sheet in his Harbor Freight tool box.


Reminds me of a print I got at work, from Nissan. I work for a fastener manufacturer. On the print it said "Appry patch here". It's one thing to have the accent, another to type with it!

 

[Basil]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Kevin Genoff:

My friend had a similar sheet in his Harbor Freight tool box.


Reminds me of a print I got at work, from Nissan. I work for a fastener manufacturer. On the print it said "Appry patch here". It's one thing to have the accent, another to type with it!<hr></blockquote>

I don't understand why they don't just have someone who has English as a first language proof read that stuff. Seems like that would be an easy thing to do.