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Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

lawguy

Jedi Knight
Offline
Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
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Just one, but the light bulb has to want to change.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many graduate students does it take to change a light bulb?
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Only one, but it may take him/her more than five years to do it.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

:How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
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None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
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How many can you afford?
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many Teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

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Seventeen. "YOU got a problem with that?!?"

[ 11-18-2003: Message edited by: lawguy ]</p>
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many Liberal Arts students does it take to change a light bulb?


Only one, but they get 3 credits for it!
grin.gif
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

For the musicians out there:

How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
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Nineteen, one to hold the light bulb and eighteen to drink until the room spins.

thirsty.gif
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many men does it take to change a light bulb?
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Only one, but it takes three years, as he holds the new bulb up and waits for the world to revolve around him.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many grumpy old men does it take to change a light bulb?
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Change a light bulb? Back in my day, we made our light bulbs last and if we did have one go out, we made do with candles...and we liked it that way....you kids and your fancy new light bulbs, consarn it.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

Lawguy...I can already hear the stories you're gonna give the little lawguys & gals!...walked 5 miles to school every day in knee deep snow, uphill both ways!
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many professional basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?
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Just one, but then there's his manager, his posse, and that's about 25, his children, that about 9 and his children's mothers, so that's another 9, his lawyer and his dealer.....
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many grandmothers does it take to change a lightbulb??

0, You and the kids just go home, I'll be fine. I'll just sit here, in the dark, by myself, I just hope no one decides to break in since the lights are off......
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many folksingers does it take to change a light bulb?
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Five. One to change the bulb and four to make a quartet to sing about how much better the old bulb was.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
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Seven--one to supervise, one to arrange for the electricity to be shut off, one to make sure that safety and quality standards are maintained, one to monitor compliance with local, state, and federal regulations, one to manage personnel relations, one to fill out the paperwork and one to screw the light bulb into the water faucet.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many accountants does it take to change a lightbulb?
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Give me a few minutes and it can be any number you want.

[ 11-21-2003: Message edited by: MichaelF ]</p>
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
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Fish.
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

how many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Gimme five grand and i'll get one to ask the house

=======

How many hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Who cares man

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

none, they dont fit
 
Re: Favorite "light bulb" joke- post 'em

I think this might have been here before.....
How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?


1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.
 
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