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British Euphamisms

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I noticed after reading Jaguar Saloons by Chris Harvey that Jaguars do not rust. They "are commonly affected by corrosion" or "are frequently corroded"! :smile:
Of course, we do not drive cars, we drive "Proper Motor Cars" aka PMC's or perhaps LBPMC's on this forum. When they don't run, they have "failed to proceed". Does anyone else have or know of similar expressions that seem unique to our beloved automobiles?
 
<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">We might as well throw some Lucas ones out there...

While other talked about it Lucas invented the the original anti theft device.

Lucas were also the inventors of the first intermittent wiper, although they thought it was normal.

Lucas are also the inventor of the self-dimming headlights.

All of their headlights had a three position switch - Dim, Flicker and Off.</span>
 
On British Motorcars, you do not "pry" on things, you "prize" them. and bolt's are never "loosened with a wrench" you "slacken them with your spanner". You do not have a windshield on top of your cowel. you have a windscreen on your scuttle. They are usually equipped with demisters, and have fasteners across the top edge to attach the removable "hood"(convertable top) not to be confused with the bonnett, that covers the engine.
Reading British repair manuals is fun.
 
Bollocks. It's a bother to try explaining to a client his trafficators are knacker'd.
 
Yes, and the spare tyre is in the boot. Of course, you have to remove the nave plate before you slacken the nuts with your spanner.
 
I've always felt it a shame that Jane Austen lived in the wrong century to write shop manuals.
 
Sometimes I am completely gobsmacked by the colonials butchering of the Queen's english. Everyone knows that things always go pear-shaped when Lord Lucas plays his games. I go down the apples and pears to the cellar being careful not to trip on me plates. In the old days men never went out without their tit'fer (not rude for the more sensitive of you).

When Amos is behaving himself Dale thinks that it is brilliant and definitely the dogs bollocks, but when the Crypt Car shows up it is more aggro than it's worth.

Bumming a fag in London is not an obscene act.

I have noticed that when someone is repairing an LBC at a car show there will be a crowd of people around the car having a butchers.

Oh and steel rusts, aluminium corrodes.
 
Geez, Ian, that was perfectly understandable. That frightens me. :wink:


BoneIdle said:
I've always felt it a shame that Jane Austen lived in the wrong century to write shop manuals.

But... err... ya mean she DIDN'T write those?!?!


...I'm crushed...

I thought I had literary CLASSICS here.
 
I've a passing familiarity with English euphamisms - both automotive and colloquial, but I've never heard of hubcaps being called "nave plates" before.

That said, I still call wrenches spanners and I only realise when I get blank looks. I can function in normal conversation, but I still have to think hard to talk "car" here...
 
And don't forget to depart from the off side lest you ger knackered by a passing lorrie!

You guys are great! :smile: These postings are just the sort of thing I was thinking about when I started this thread!! Pip pip and cheerio to you all! :smile: And if you don't like then bloody well bugger off!! LOL <Ok, that wasn't automobile related, but WAS British!! :D>
 
alana said:
I've a passing familiarity with English euphamisms - both automotive and colloquial, but I've never heard of hubcaps being called "nave plates" before.

That said, I still call wrenches spanners and I only realise when I get blank looks. I can function in normal conversation, but I still have to think hard to talk "car" here...

Say aught. It'll be unnerstood. :laugh:
 
alana said:
I've a passing familiarity with English euphamisms - both automotive and colloquial, but I've never heard of hubcaps being called "nave plates" before.

That said, I still call wrenches spanners and I only realise when I get blank looks. I can function in normal conversation, but I still have to think hard to talk "car" here...

Hub Caps are fings wot fit on hubs,so as to keep the grease in 'em and stop it dribblin' all over the Queen's 'ighway.

Nave plates fit on wheels so as you carn't see the nuts.

Flippin' yanks. Get nuffin' right!

An' anyway, that ain't a euphemism!
 
Banjo, a bloke 'as to "prise" the lid off to win the "prize"! :wink: and of course, one may cock a foot on a 'fender, but NOT on a wing (bad form!!). Contrary to convention, a right cock-up does not involve Viagra!
 
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:]Flippin' yanks.[/QUOTE]

except I'm not a septic.

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:] Get nuffin' right![/QUOTE]

I don't cop much right, right, but it's more than nuffin'. Yer'll find that they're pretty much 'ubcaps 'ere if they go on weels. A nave plate's sumfink they'd 'ave a collection wiv in church.

<span style="font-style: italic">Ok, enough Mockney. I prefer Redneck - when in Rome and all that...</span>

Ah doesn't git much right, but it's mo'e than nuthin'. Yo'll find thet they're purdy much hubcaps hyar eff'n they hoof it on wheels. A nave plate's sumpin they'd haf a colleckshun wif in church.
 
Alan's a naturalized Yankee Redneck!!! WOOHOO!!

....err....

YEEEE HAW!!!! :wink:
 
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