beer

[Randi]

> Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed.
> Then
> I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and
> all
> of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might
> be
> out of work and their dreams would be shattered. I think, "It is
> better
> to Drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and
>
> worry about my liver."
>
> -- Babe Ruth
>
>
> An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time
> with fools.
> -- Ernest Hemingway
>
>
> When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
> -- Paul Hornung
>
>
> 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think
> not.
> -- H.L. Mencken
>
>
> When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
> When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go
> to
> heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
>
> -- George Bernard Shaw
>
>
> Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
> -- Benjamin Franklin
>
>
> Without question, the greatest invention in the history of
> mankind
> is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention,
> but
> the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
>
> -- Dave Barry
>
>
>
> Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B.C.
> -- W.C. Fields
>
>
> Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.
> -- Professor Irwin Corey
>
>
> To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group." Salvation
> in
> a can!
> -- Leo Durocher
>
>
> One night at Cheers, Cliff Clavin explained the "Buffalo Theory"
> to
> his buddy, Norm:
> "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only
> move
> as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is
> the
> slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This
> natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the
> general
> speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular
> killing of the
> weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only
> operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of
> alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks
> the
> slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular
> consumption
> of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster
> and
> more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a
> few
> beers."
>
>

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/thirsty.gifRandi /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/jester.gif