Hey there Guest!
Hey - did you know if you click on the title of a thread it will take you to the first unread post since you last visited that thread?
but were afraid to ask: 
STOP!! Never post your email address in open forums. Bots can "harvest" your email! If you must share your email use a Private Message or use the 
smilie in place of the real @
Pretty Please - add it to our Events forum(s) and add to the calendar! >> 
78Z
Darth Vader
Offline
Only a Real Manly Man would recognize that the true answers are all "C"...
1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire Earth.
What do you do?
A. Present it to the President of the United States.
B. Present it to the Secretary General of the United Nations.
C. Take it apart.
2. As you grow older, what lost quality of your youthful life do you miss the most?
A. Innocence.
B. Idealism.
C. Cherry bombs.
3. When is it okay to kiss another male?
A. When you wish to display simple and pure affection without regard for narrow-minded
social conventions.
B. When he is the pope. (Not on the lips.)
C. When he is your brother, and you are Al Pacino, and this is the only way to let him know
that, for business reasons, you have to have him killed.
4. What about hugging another male?
A. If he's your father and at least one of you has a fatal disease.
B. If you're performing the Heimlich maneuver.
C. If you're a professional baseball player and a teammate hits a homerun to win the World
Series, you may hug him provided that:
(1) He is legally within the base path, (2) Both of you are wearing sufficient protection,
and (3) You also pound him fraternally with your fist hard enough to cause fractures.
6. In your opinion, the ideal pet is:
A. A cat.
B. A dog.
C. A dog that eats cats.
7. You have been seeing a woman for several years. She's attractive and intelligent, and you
always enjoy being with her. One leisurely Sunday afternoon the two of you are taking it easy.
You're watching a football game; she's reading the papers. Suddenly, out of the clear blue
sky, she tells you that she thinks she really loves you, but she can no longer bear the
uncertainty of not knowing where your relationship is going. She says she's not asking
whether you want to get married; only whether you believe that you have some kind of future
together. What do you say?
A. That you sincerely believe the two of you do have a future, but you don't want to rush it.
B. That although you also have strong feelings for her, you cannot honestly say that you'll
be ready anytime soon to make a lasting commitment, and you don't want to hurt her
by holding out false hope.
C. That you cannot believe the Jets called a draw play on third and seventeen.
8. Okay, so you have decided that you truly love a woman and you want to spend the rest of
your life with her - sharing the joys and the sorrows the world has to offer, come what may.
How do you tell her?
A. You take her to a nice restaurant and tell her after dinner.
B. You take her for a walk on a moonlit beach, and you say her name, and when she turns to
you, with the sea breeze blowing her hair and the stars in her eyes, you tell her.
C. Tell her what?
9. One weekday morning your wife wakes up feeling ill and asks you to get your three children
ready for school. Your first question to her is:
A. "Do they need to eat or anything?"
B. "They're in school already?"
C. "There are three of them?"
10. When is it okay to throw away a set of veteran underwear?
A. When it has turned the color of a dead whale and developed new holes so large that
you're not sure which ones were originally intended for your legs.
B. When it is down to eight loosely connected underwear molecules and has to be handled
with tweezers.
C. It is never okay to throw away veteran underwear. A real guy checks the garbage regularly in case somebody (and we are not naming names, but this would be his wife) is quietly trying to discard his underwear, which she is frankly jealous of, because the guy seems to have a more intimate relationship with it than with her.
11. What, in your opinion, is the most reasonable explanation for the fact that Moses led the
Israelites all over the place for forty years before they finally got to the Promised Land?
A. He was being tested.
B. He wanted them to really appreciate the Promised Land when they finally got there.
C. He refused to ask for directions in the tradition of all manly men.
12. What is the human race's single greatest achievement?
A. Democracy.
B. Religion.
C. Remote control.
1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire Earth.
What do you do?
A. Present it to the President of the United States.
B. Present it to the Secretary General of the United Nations.
C. Take it apart.
2. As you grow older, what lost quality of your youthful life do you miss the most?
A. Innocence.
B. Idealism.
C. Cherry bombs.
3. When is it okay to kiss another male?
A. When you wish to display simple and pure affection without regard for narrow-minded
social conventions.
B. When he is the pope. (Not on the lips.)
C. When he is your brother, and you are Al Pacino, and this is the only way to let him know
that, for business reasons, you have to have him killed.
4. What about hugging another male?
A. If he's your father and at least one of you has a fatal disease.
B. If you're performing the Heimlich maneuver.
C. If you're a professional baseball player and a teammate hits a homerun to win the World
Series, you may hug him provided that:
(1) He is legally within the base path, (2) Both of you are wearing sufficient protection,
and (3) You also pound him fraternally with your fist hard enough to cause fractures.
6. In your opinion, the ideal pet is:
A. A cat.
B. A dog.
C. A dog that eats cats.
7. You have been seeing a woman for several years. She's attractive and intelligent, and you
always enjoy being with her. One leisurely Sunday afternoon the two of you are taking it easy.
You're watching a football game; she's reading the papers. Suddenly, out of the clear blue
sky, she tells you that she thinks she really loves you, but she can no longer bear the
uncertainty of not knowing where your relationship is going. She says she's not asking
whether you want to get married; only whether you believe that you have some kind of future
together. What do you say?
A. That you sincerely believe the two of you do have a future, but you don't want to rush it.
B. That although you also have strong feelings for her, you cannot honestly say that you'll
be ready anytime soon to make a lasting commitment, and you don't want to hurt her
by holding out false hope.
C. That you cannot believe the Jets called a draw play on third and seventeen.
8. Okay, so you have decided that you truly love a woman and you want to spend the rest of
your life with her - sharing the joys and the sorrows the world has to offer, come what may.
How do you tell her?
A. You take her to a nice restaurant and tell her after dinner.
B. You take her for a walk on a moonlit beach, and you say her name, and when she turns to
you, with the sea breeze blowing her hair and the stars in her eyes, you tell her.
C. Tell her what?
9. One weekday morning your wife wakes up feeling ill and asks you to get your three children
ready for school. Your first question to her is:
A. "Do they need to eat or anything?"
B. "They're in school already?"
C. "There are three of them?"
10. When is it okay to throw away a set of veteran underwear?
A. When it has turned the color of a dead whale and developed new holes so large that
you're not sure which ones were originally intended for your legs.
B. When it is down to eight loosely connected underwear molecules and has to be handled
with tweezers.
C. It is never okay to throw away veteran underwear. A real guy checks the garbage regularly in case somebody (and we are not naming names, but this would be his wife) is quietly trying to discard his underwear, which she is frankly jealous of, because the guy seems to have a more intimate relationship with it than with her.
11. What, in your opinion, is the most reasonable explanation for the fact that Moses led the
Israelites all over the place for forty years before they finally got to the Promised Land?
A. He was being tested.
B. He wanted them to really appreciate the Promised Land when they finally got there.
C. He refused to ask for directions in the tradition of all manly men.
12. What is the human race's single greatest achievement?
A. Democracy.
B. Religion.
C. Remote control.
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