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BabaKahawa
Jedi Knight
Offline
My car broke down on the way home from work. Since I live in the countryside I called my wife and told her that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odour of beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of beans and two cold beers. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.
I took a seat at the dinner table when I got home and just as she was about to sit, the telephone rang. She made me promise not to touch the food until she returned and went to answer the call.
The beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my wife was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously.
Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.
Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.
The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signalled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.
Hey.. We've all done this, Right?
I didn't even touch the food.
So why am I sleeping in the truck?
I took a seat at the dinner table when I got home and just as she was about to sit, the telephone rang. She made me promise not to touch the food until she returned and went to answer the call.
The beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my wife was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously.
Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.
Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.
The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signalled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.
Hey.. We've all done this, Right?
I didn't even touch the food.
So why am I sleeping in the truck?
