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Things I wished I hadn't said

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TR6oldtimer

TR6oldtimer

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There was this good looking Gal I really liked. So finally after a couple of dates I got her to come over to my house for dinner (I had grand ideas for the evening). The dinner was great, the wine was great, the conversation going exactly where I wanted it go. After dinner she helped carry some dishes into the kitchen and asked "Where's your dishwasher?" To which I replied "I once had one, but I divorced her." Things did not go as planned after that.
 
Ray...could have been worse could have wrapped it up by saying that's the problem with having your dishwasher, cook, launderer, house cleaner, car valet and lawnkeeper all rolled into one!!!!

oh yea... she could've made more salary at her day job too!!

<chuckle>
 
Or you could've asked her if she'd like to interview for the job - hands on demonstration required.
 
"Want a cup of coffee after class?"


first words spoken to X-wife

Wow!! Serious blunder on my part.

d
 
alana said:
I thought this was going to be simple - "I do"
:frown:
Click to expand...

:lol: that's exactly what I was thinking....
 
With an ex g/f at a haloween party, where I was instructed to get drunk (I had been the DD for every event between us and her friends). Anyways, one of her friends was going through a divorce, and made the comment that her only pleasure at the time were adult movies, and certain adult toys. To which, I turned to her and in a loud, yet quite drunkly, asked her, "Which one of us has the bigger collection?"



That didn't quite go as planned.
 
Noice one, Rob... *sheesh*. :jester:
 
Out on the beach one summer day while in college, I introduced my girlfriend to my mother's college roommate, who we ran in to.

Me: "Mrs. Williamson, I'd like you to meet my girlfriend, Sherry Carter. Sherry, this is Mrs. Williamson, my mother's roomate from college."

Mrs. Williamson: "Pleased to meet you."

Girlfriend: "That's not my name." (turns and walks briskly down the beach....alone.)

That was pretty much it.
 
Shinsen774 said:
Me: "Mrs. Williamson, I'd like you to meet my girlfriend, Sherry Carter...

Girlfriend: "That's not my name." (turns and walks briskly down the beach....alone.)

That was pretty much it.
Click to expand...

I think I'll have to file that one away for a possible future escape. Thanks!
 
One night my wife woke me up saying "What did you say? What did you say?" I replied, "Brenda, what is the matter?"

Her name is not Brenda.

Somehow I survived that one.

I still think of Brenda from time to time.

A time bomb just waiting to go off.
 
You need to review that old Imogene Coca and Joey Bishop routine where his wife, played by Imogene, catches him in bed with another woman and he does the right thing. Deny, deny, deny.
 
TR6BILL said:
You need to review that old Imogene Coca and Joey Bishop routine where his wife, played by Imogene, catches him in bed with another woman and he does the right thing. Deny, deny, deny.
Click to expand...

More like Terry-Thomas who lost a delicate article left in the house by Jayne Mansfield after a romp.
 
Somehow, I don't think Jayne Mansfield had any delicate articles. All pretty much queen sized.
 
Terry-Thomas's wife in the movie was not as well endowed as Jane, hence the problem.
 
Shades of that old joke about the new groom who drinks a little TOO much at the reception, goes looking for his new bride and finds her in bed with his brother. He returns to the reception, giggling. His friends ask him what's so funny. He says "My wife is upstairs in bed with my brother! She is so drunk, she thinks it's ME!"
 
ray...with opening lines like yours you probably won't have to worry...but just in case only date and marry a Brenda!!!
 
BIBBER said:
ray...with opening lines like yours you probably won't have to worry...but just in case only date and marry a Brenda!!!
Click to expand...

To late, but I have learned the Brenda I knew is alive and well in Chandler, Arizona.
 
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