There otta be a Law

[Brooklands]

<u>Law of Mechanical Repair</u>
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

<u>Law of the Workshop</u>
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

<u>Law of Probability</u>
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

<u>Law of the Telephone</u>
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

<u>Law of the Alibi</u>
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

<u>Variation Law</u>
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

<u>Law of the Bath</u>
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

<u>Law of Close Encounters</u>
The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

<u>Law of the Result</u>
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will

<u>Law of Biomechanics</u>
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

<u>Law of the Theater</u>
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

<u>Law of Coffee</u>
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

<u>Murphy's Law of Lockers</u>
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

<u>Law of Rugs/Carpets</u>
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

<u>Law of Location</u>
No matter where you go, there you are.

<u>Law of Logical Argument</u>
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

<u>Brown's Law</u>
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

<u>Oliver's Law</u>
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

<u>Wilson's Law</u>
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it. (this one is true every time!)

<u>Doctors' Law</u>
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

<u>Brooklandd' Law</u>
If I find something funny to forward or post, someone will have just posted it or forwarded it last week.