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Hey - did you know if you click on the title of a thread it will take you to the first unread post since you last visited that thread?
but were afraid to ask: 
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Pretty Please - add it to our Events forum(s) and add to the calendar! >> 
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An Englishman is being shown around a Scottish hospital. Towards the end of his visit, he is shown into a ward with a number of people with no obvious signs of injury. He goes to speak to the first man he sees and the man pipes up: "Fair fa' yer honest sonsie face, Great chieftain e' the puddin' race! Aboon them a'ye tak your place, painch, tripe, or thairm: Weel are ye wordy o'a grace as lang's my arm."
The Englishman, being somewhat taken aback, goes to the next patient and immediately the patient launches into: "Some hae meat, and canna eat, And some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, And sae the Lord be thankit."
This continues with the next patient: "Wee sleekit, cow'rin, tim'rous beastie, O, what aq panic's in thy breastie! Thou need not start awa sae hasty, Wi bickering brattle I wad be laith to run and chase thee, Wi murdering pattle!"
The Englishman turns to the doctor accompanying him on the visit and asks what sort of ward this is: a psychiatric ward?
"No, No," replies the doctor, "It's the serious Burns unit."
The Englishman, being somewhat taken aback, goes to the next patient and immediately the patient launches into: "Some hae meat, and canna eat, And some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, And sae the Lord be thankit."
This continues with the next patient: "Wee sleekit, cow'rin, tim'rous beastie, O, what aq panic's in thy breastie! Thou need not start awa sae hasty, Wi bickering brattle I wad be laith to run and chase thee, Wi murdering pattle!"
The Englishman turns to the doctor accompanying him on the visit and asks what sort of ward this is: a psychiatric ward?
"No, No," replies the doctor, "It's the serious Burns unit."
