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No nursing home for me!!!
About 2 years ago my wife and I were on a cruise through the western
Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner. At dinner we noticed an elderly
lady sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in the main
dining room. I also noticed that all the staff, ships officers, waiters,
busboys, etc., all seemed very familiar with this lady. I asked our
waiter who the lady was, expecting to be told she owned the line, but he
said he only knew that she had been on board for the last four cruises,
back to back.As we left the dining room one evening I caught her eye and
stopped to
say hello. We chatted and I said, "I understand you've been on this ship
for the last four cruises." She replied, "Yes, that' s true."
I stated, "I don't understand" and she replied, without a pause, "It's cheaper
than a nursing home."
So, there will be no nursing home in my future. When I get old and
feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship. The average cost
for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on reservations at
Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior discount price of
$135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:
1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day (of fantastic food, not
institutional food) if I can waddle to the restaurant, or I can have
room service (which means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the
week)
3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free
washers and dryers, and shows every night.
4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.
5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5
worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days!
7. TV broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress
replaced? No problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your
inconvenience.
8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to ask
for them.
9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare;
if you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you
to a suite for the rest of your life.
10. There is always a doctor on board.
Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the
Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you
want to go? Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't look for me
in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.
PS: And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at
no charge.
About 2 years ago my wife and I were on a cruise through the western
Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner. At dinner we noticed an elderly
lady sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in the main
dining room. I also noticed that all the staff, ships officers, waiters,
busboys, etc., all seemed very familiar with this lady. I asked our
waiter who the lady was, expecting to be told she owned the line, but he
said he only knew that she had been on board for the last four cruises,
back to back.As we left the dining room one evening I caught her eye and
stopped to
say hello. We chatted and I said, "I understand you've been on this ship
for the last four cruises." She replied, "Yes, that' s true."
I stated, "I don't understand" and she replied, without a pause, "It's cheaper
than a nursing home."
So, there will be no nursing home in my future. When I get old and
feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship. The average cost
for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on reservations at
Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior discount price of
$135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:
1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day (of fantastic food, not
institutional food) if I can waddle to the restaurant, or I can have
room service (which means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the
week)
3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free
washers and dryers, and shows every night.
4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.
5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5
worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days!
7. TV broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress
replaced? No problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your
inconvenience.
8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to ask
for them.
9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare;
if you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you
to a suite for the rest of your life.
10. There is always a doctor on board.
Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the
Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you
want to go? Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't look for me
in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.
PS: And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at
no charge.
