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A Guide To Interpreting Performance Reviews
Average................................................Not to bright
Exceptionally well qualified.....................Has committed no major blunders to date
Active socially.......................................Drinks heavily
Zealous attitude....................................Opinionated
Character above reproach.....................One step ahead of the law
Unlimited potential................................Will stick until retirement
Quick thinking.....................................Offers plausible excuses for errors
Takes pride in his work.........................Conceited
Takes every opportunity to progress......Buys drinks for supervisors
Forceful and aggressive.......................Argumentative
Needs little supervision........................Knows more than his superiors
Stern disciplinarian..............................A boastard
Tactful when dealing with superiors........Knows when to keep his mouth shut
Approaches problems logically...............Finds someone else to do the job
A keen analyst......................................Thoroughly confused
Not a desk man.....................................Did not graduate from high school
Expresses himself well..........................Speaks English
Spend extra hours on the job.................Has a miserable home life
Conscientious and careful.....................Scared sh!!tless
Pays attention to detail.........................A nitpicker
Shows qualities of leadership.................Has a loud voice
Judgement is usually sound..................Lucky
Maintains a professional attitude...........A snob
Strong adherence to principal...............Stubborn
Slightly below average........................Stupid
There, you have it, a guide to performance review survival in the real world!!!!!!!
Average................................................Not to bright
Exceptionally well qualified.....................Has committed no major blunders to date
Active socially.......................................Drinks heavily
Zealous attitude....................................Opinionated
Character above reproach.....................One step ahead of the law
Unlimited potential................................Will stick until retirement
Quick thinking.....................................Offers plausible excuses for errors
Takes pride in his work.........................Conceited
Takes every opportunity to progress......Buys drinks for supervisors
Forceful and aggressive.......................Argumentative
Needs little supervision........................Knows more than his superiors
Stern disciplinarian..............................A boastard
Tactful when dealing with superiors........Knows when to keep his mouth shut
Approaches problems logically...............Finds someone else to do the job
A keen analyst......................................Thoroughly confused
Not a desk man.....................................Did not graduate from high school
Expresses himself well..........................Speaks English
Spend extra hours on the job.................Has a miserable home life
Conscientious and careful.....................Scared sh!!tless
Pays attention to detail.........................A nitpicker
Shows qualities of leadership.................Has a loud voice
Judgement is usually sound..................Lucky
Maintains a professional attitude...........A snob
Strong adherence to principal...............Stubborn
Slightly below average........................Stupid
There, you have it, a guide to performance review survival in the real world!!!!!!!