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More Fun with Religion

Mickey Richaud

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A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains to the students of a northern university. They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.

One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it.

Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the experience. Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has various bandages, goes first. "Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."

Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he claimed, " WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek.
So I quick-DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."

They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape. The rabbi look s up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start."
 
That one Mickey, is a cut above the rest I have read here. Thanks

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif
 
<slowly shakes head>

My respect for you Paul...

*sigh*

has risen slightly, I'm somewhat ashamed to admit.
 
Geez /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
That one Mickey, is a cut above the rest I have read here. Thanks

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Or a cut below, as it were.
 
Reminds me of a very similar version.
A Priest, a Penticostal preacher, and a Rabbi all have churches on the same street, and live in the same suburb. So they all get togeather and decide to buy a decent car togeather to save on expenses.
The deal is made and a fine vehicle is purchased. On the way home from the dealer they stop at the lake to have lunch. While they're eating, the Priest suggests that they ought to "initiate" the new car into the service of the lord.
All agree, but it's unclear as to how to go about it. The priest says since it was his idea, he'd go first.
He says a prayer, and sprinkles the car with holy water, then proclaims "there. It's done"
The Preacher gives him a look, and says "That's not how it's done."
He takes the keys, drives the car over to the boat launch, backs it into the lake, then pulls it back out, dripping wet. Then he get's out and says "There! that's how it's done!"
Then the Priest and the Preacher turn to the Rabbi.
He calmly walks over to the car, opens the trunk, takes out a hacksaw, and cuts 3 inches off the tailpipe.
 
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif better one - lol!!!!
 
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