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Hey - did you know if you click on the title of a thread it will take you to the first unread post since you last visited that thread?
but were afraid to ask: 
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Pretty Please - add it to our Events forum(s) and add to the calendar! >> 
SilentUnicorn
Yoda
Offline
A guy walks into a bar and notices a very large jar on the
counter and sees it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. The
man guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it. He
approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?"
"Well, you pay ten dollars and, if you pass three tests, you
get all the money."
The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the
three tests? "Pay first," says the bartender. "Those are the
rules."
So the man gives him the $10 and the bartender drops it into
the jar.
"OK," the bartender says, "here's what you need to do. First
you have to drink that entire gallon of pepper tequila... the
whole thing, all at once... and you can't <make a face while
doing it. Second, there's a pit bull chained-up out back with
a sore tooth. You have to remove the tooth with your bare
hands. Third, there's a 90 year-old woman upstairs who has
never been fulfilled during intercourse. You've gotta make
things right for her."
The man is stunned. "I know I paid my 10 bucks, but I'm not an
idiot! I won't do it! You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of
pepper tequila, and then do those other things ..." "Your call,"
says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is."
As time goes on and the man has a few drinks, then a few more,
he asks
"Wherez zat cteeqeelah?" He grabs the gallon with both hands
and downs it with a big slurp. Tears are streaming down both
cheeks, but he doesn't make a face. Next, he staggers out back
where the pit bull is chained-up and soon all the people inside
the bar hear a huge, noisy, scuffle going on outside. They hear
the pit bull barking, the guy screaming, the pit bull yelping and
then.... silence.
Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers
back into the bar, with his shirt ripped and large, bloody scratches
all over his body. "Now," he says, "where's the old woman with
the sore tooth??"
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif
counter and sees it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. The
man guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it. He
approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?"
"Well, you pay ten dollars and, if you pass three tests, you
get all the money."
The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the
three tests? "Pay first," says the bartender. "Those are the
rules."
So the man gives him the $10 and the bartender drops it into
the jar.
"OK," the bartender says, "here's what you need to do. First
you have to drink that entire gallon of pepper tequila... the
whole thing, all at once... and you can't <make a face while
doing it. Second, there's a pit bull chained-up out back with
a sore tooth. You have to remove the tooth with your bare
hands. Third, there's a 90 year-old woman upstairs who has
never been fulfilled during intercourse. You've gotta make
things right for her."
The man is stunned. "I know I paid my 10 bucks, but I'm not an
idiot! I won't do it! You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of
pepper tequila, and then do those other things ..." "Your call,"
says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is."
As time goes on and the man has a few drinks, then a few more,
he asks
"Wherez zat cteeqeelah?" He grabs the gallon with both hands
and downs it with a big slurp. Tears are streaming down both
cheeks, but he doesn't make a face. Next, he staggers out back
where the pit bull is chained-up and soon all the people inside
the bar hear a huge, noisy, scuffle going on outside. They hear
the pit bull barking, the guy screaming, the pit bull yelping and
then.... silence.
Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers
back into the bar, with his shirt ripped and large, bloody scratches
all over his body. "Now," he says, "where's the old woman with
the sore tooth??"
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif
