Hi Guest!
Hey - did you know if you click on the title of a thread it will take you to the first unread post since you last visited that thread?
but were afraid to ask: 
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Pretty Please - add it to our Events forum(s) and add to the calendar! >> 
racing girl
Jedi Knight
Offline
My sister in England just sent this to me... excerpts from letters of complaints from people living in local authority houses. Some are definitely questionable, but I suppose it depends how you read them!!!!
Warning, I'm still crying with laughter 1/2 an hour later...
"Believe it or not, these are extracts from actual letters sent to various local councils in the UK. Some of these are classics !
* I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
* I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
* Their 18 year old son is continuously banging his balls against my fence.
* I wish to report that tiles are missing from the roof of the outside toilet and I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.
* The lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
* I am writing on behalf of my sink which is coming away from the wall.
* Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.
* I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
* I am still having trouble with smoke in my built-in drawers.
* The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.
* Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny color and not fit to drink.
* Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now it is in three pieces.
* Would you please send a man to repair my sprout. I am an old age pensioner and need it straight away.
* The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
* Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so will you please send someone around to do something about it.
* I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would be pleased if you could do something about the noise made by the man I have on top
of me every night
* Please send a man with clean tools to finish the job and satisfy the wife.
* We are getting married in September and would like it in the garden before we move into the house."
Warning, I'm still crying with laughter 1/2 an hour later...
"Believe it or not, these are extracts from actual letters sent to various local councils in the UK. Some of these are classics !
* I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
* I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
* Their 18 year old son is continuously banging his balls against my fence.
* I wish to report that tiles are missing from the roof of the outside toilet and I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.
* The lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
* I am writing on behalf of my sink which is coming away from the wall.
* Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.
* I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
* I am still having trouble with smoke in my built-in drawers.
* The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.
* Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny color and not fit to drink.
* Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now it is in three pieces.
* Would you please send a man to repair my sprout. I am an old age pensioner and need it straight away.
* The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
* Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so will you please send someone around to do something about it.
* I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would be pleased if you could do something about the noise made by the man I have on top
of me every night
* Please send a man with clean tools to finish the job and satisfy the wife.
* We are getting married in September and would like it in the garden before we move into the house."
