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English Official Language of EU

Mickey Richaud

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From one of the members of the Nashville British Car Club:

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards can have one letter less.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the laguag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensible riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a United Urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter za fifz yer, ve al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
 
Haha, thats great.
 
Ah, monsieur, ze haf not asked Le French....
 
dat vun got me gud! I never zaw it kumink.
 
I have been searching for that. Got it a long time ago and now have a German working for me and wanted to show it to him.

GREAT!!!!!

Bruce
 
I love it...My daughter is a third year German student. She is going to love that one.
JC
 
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif That's a good one! Seriously, it amazed me when I was stationed in Germany how it seemed you could ALMOST understand what someone was saying in German - until they changed the sentence structure!
 
My daughter can pretty much hold a conversation in German at this point. Not exactly sure why she choose that language but it is cool at any rate. The thing is, I'm like you, I can almost understand what she is saying but it never quite comes to me until she translates it for me.
JC
 
spooky, isn't it? I think part of it is there is no set sentence structure in German like there is in English - so what we hear doesn't match what we expect and thows us off. I learned enough German to get by while I was there, but other than a few choice phrases I've forgotten it.
 
I had the same problem when I was taking Spanish. All the gender specific conjugation left me with a puzzled look on my face. However, when I was in Italy for a year, I found that the limited success in spanish class helped me learn the small amount of Italian required to survive there.
JC
 
I had a German have a look at it and he meant it was absolute "rhubarb". I gues he meant rubbish, but what the hack. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif
 
I saw a similar joke on the internet whne Arnold became the Gov of Kalifornia..... we had some lafs arond ze ofis viz zat von
 
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