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A Dictionary To Better Understand Women

Henri

Jedi Knight
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The following was actually sent to me by a women...go figure...maybe she want me to understand her better... /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazyeyes.gif

Women's English

Yes = No

No = Yes

Maybe = No

I'm Sorry = You'll be sorry

We need = I want

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.

We need to talk = I need to complain.

Sure, go ahead = I don't want you to.

I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

You're so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.

The kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.

I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper...

Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!

I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.

Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.

How much do you love me? = I did something you're really not going to like.

I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.

Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.

Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're dead.]

Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he falls asleep.

I'm not yelling! = Yes, I am yelling because I think this is important.

The same old thing = Nothing

Nothing = Everything

Everything = My PMS is acting up. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/thumbsup.gif
 
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