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Thread: Corn Collection

Heard a good joke lately? Please share it with us. PLEASE KEEP IT CLEAN AND IN GOOD TASTE! If in doubt, don't post it!

  1. #1
    Jedi Knight
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    Corn Collection

    A man is at his house when he hears a loud knock on his door. He looks out the window and sees a police officer so he opens up and says, "Hello officer, what can I do for you?"

    The officer says, "I'm sorry sir, but you're under arrest for illegally downloading all of Wikipedia."

    Frantically, the man replies, "Officer wait, I can explain everything!"

    --------------

    I was watching an Australian cooking show, and people started cheering when the chef made a meringue.

    I was shocked. Usually Australians boo meringue.

    ---------------

    A math professor walks into his classroom with a black eye.

    Student: What happened professor?

    Prof: I got into a fight.

    Student: With who?

    Prof: Numbers that arenít divisible by 2.

    Class Clown: I guess the odds were against you.
    Mike
    66 TR4A

  2. #2
    Moderator Mickey Richaud's Avatar
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    Re: Corn Collection

    Hey, Bas - if you're missing your joke book, methinks Mike has it.
    "There are three kinds of men. One who learns by readin'. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on that electric fence for themselves." Will Rogers
    Mickey Richaud - '73 MGB, '69 MGB GT/V6 (both SOLD! ); Victor TF 1800; '03 Jaguar XK8
    ------------------------------------------------------------

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    Yoda Gliderman8's Avatar
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    Re: Corn Collection

    Quote Originally Posted by Mickey Richaud View Post
    Hey, Bas - if you're missing your joke book, methinks Mike has it.
    Not to worry Mickey. Bas’s joke book is safer than the Colonel’s secret recipe.
    Elliot
    Central PA
    1973 TR6 Damson Plum / Biscuit interior, HVDA 5-speed, Good Parts Hubs
    1976 TR6 White/Biscuit interior SOLD
    Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

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    Yoda waltesefalcon's Avatar
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    Re: Corn Collection

    Quote Originally Posted by Gliderman8 View Post
    Not to worry Mickey. Bas’s joke book is safer than the Colonel’s secret recipe.
    It's been hermetically sealed and kept in a mayonnaise jar buried in Doc's back yard since yesterday evening.
    Cheers,
    Walter
    52 International L110
    61 International C112
    68 Cadillac Coupe DeVille

  5. #5
    Great Pumpkin NutmegCT's Avatar
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    Re: Corn Collection

    Quote Originally Posted by waltesefalcon View Post
    It's been hermetically sealed and kept in a mayonnaise jar buried in Doc's back yard since yesterday evening.
    Walt, remember ...

    "I hold in my hand the envelopes. As a child of four can plainly see, these envelopes have been hermetically sealed. They've been kept in a mayonnaise jar on Price Waterhouse's back porch since noon today. No one knows the contents of these envelopes Ė but you, in your mystical and borderline divine way, will ascertain the answers having never before heard the questions."

    (or words to that effect ...)

    Wow, do I ever miss '60s TV.
    Mac & Phyllis Take a Trip: http://nutmegflyer.com/trip-details-daily-updates/
    History: 1976 MGB, 1959 Triumph TR3A, 1960 Mercedes-Benz 190b, 1958 Rambler American.
    Current: 1953 MG TD27318.

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    Yoda AngliaGT's Avatar
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    Re: Corn Collection

    Quote Originally Posted by waltesefalcon View Post
    It's been hermetically sealed and kept in a mayonnaise jar buried in Doc's back yard since yesterday evening.
    BIG MISTAKE - it should have been put on Funk & Wagnell's front porch.
    Just Remember.......
    NOBODY ever says "COOL PRIUS!"

  7. #7
    Jedi Knight
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    Re: Corn Collection

    Do you believe in Magic? I’ve teleported the book to me...

    [At a wedding]

    Priest: Repeat after me...

    Groom: After me.

    Priest, to bride: Is he serious?

    Bride: No, his name is Gary.
    Mike
    66 TR4A

  8. #8
    Obi Wan
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    Re: Corn Collection

    Question - "Sis, boom, baa".
    Answer - "What is the sound of an exploding sheep?"

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