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Thread: My Father Passed

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    Obi Wan
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    My Father Passed

    Shortly before 7 this morning, my father passed away. He had been battling a very aggressive form of prostate cancer that just proved too much to overcome. It was almost astonishing how quickly things unraveled for him.

    My father really wasn't a car guy, with a couple of noteworthy exceptions: When he was in the Army, him and three other G.I.'s chipped in $65 each to purchase a 1949 Mercedes. He also used to tell me that when he was younger he used to dream about owning an MG-TC, TD, TF. So, when I brought the '69 Sprite to his house for the first time, he mentioned that to me. I did take him for a ride in the car, but his 78 year old body at the time really didn't like squeezing into something as low to the ground or as small as the Sprite. However, he did see how happy my daughter was in the Sprite. Even in his final days in hospice, he asked me how the car was doing.

    Dad was a pretty remarkable individual -- born in the Depression, childhood during World War II, ended up being drafted in the late 50s and served with a counter-intelligence unit based in Stuttgart. It gave him a skill set that he was able to parlay into a career as a Special Agent with the Department of the Treasury. His passion for music and history was passed down to me. Dad was a great husband to my mother for 57 years, and a great father to me and my sisters. However, of all the hats he wore, I think he enjoyed being a grandfather most of all, with six grandchildren, one step-grandchild and two great-grandchildren. He will be missed by all.

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    Great Pumpkin JPSmit's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Sorry to hear my friend, though even reading this short tribute it sounds like a loving and wonderful legacy. I think especially with cancer that we often have to face the truth that true love is wanting the best for the person we love even when it is not best for us - as hard as bidding farewell is, here it also brings peace and an end to suffering.

    thanks for letting us know, you are in our prayers.
    John-Peter Smit
    1976 MG Midget
    1969 Vauxhall Viva GT
    1958 Fiat Multipla (Barn art)

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    Yoda Gliderman8's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    My sincere condolences. Sounds like he was a great dad, grandfather and great grandfather. Sorry for your loss.
    Elliot
    Central PA
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    Yoda TOC's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    I am sorry. Been there.

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    Re: My Father Passed

    Very sorry to hear this. Will keep you and yours in our thoughts and prayers.
    “The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest intention.” - Oscar Wilde

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    Moderator Mickey Richaud's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Condolences here as well; your dad sounds special indeed.

    Prostate cancer is no fun. I've dealt with it - had my prostate removed a couple years ago. Still dealing with after affects, but the cancer was contained and all screens since have shown non-detectable levels.

    Public service announcement: Don't neglect the screening. After affects can be dealt with; PC, though usually slow-growing, is nasty.
    "There are three kinds of men. One who learns by readin'. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on that electric fence for themselves." Will Rogers
    Mickey Richaud - '73 MGB, '69 MGB GT/V6 (both SOLD! ); Victor TF 1800; '03 Jaguar XK8
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    Jedi Warrior Bob McElwee's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Sorry for your loss, condolences.
    Bob McElwee
    '62 AH Tri-Carb(sold)
    Miss BT

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    Jedi Knight
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Sounds like a wonderful person.

    Godspeed.
    Mike
    66 TR4A

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    Yoda Brooklands's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    So sorry to learn of your loss...it is sad watching the generations that we looked up to as children fading in the distance. We share your loss and sadness. Remember the good times. It has helped me in the 20 plus years since my dad passed away.
    Dave Reese
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    Luke Skywalker 3798j's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Good fathers are a treasure and it sounds like your dad was one of them. Getting through the grief of his passing is difficult, but take solace in his legacy and the memories that he's left you with. Feel certain you'll find them something to cherish.

    '66 TR4A '68 GT6

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    Yoda PAUL161's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    My deepest condolences for your loss. My dad has been gone 10 years now and I still think of him all the time. Many happy times and wonderful stories we still tell about him at the dinner table. He was my pillar of strength and knowledge while growing up. You'll miss your dad for sure I know, but the memories will keep him alive in your heart forever.

    Remember, Never Forget
    We Live In The Land of The Free
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    How good it feels, the hand of an old friend! Longfellow

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    Obi Wan
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Quote Originally Posted by Mickey Richaud View Post
    Condolences here as well; your dad sounds special indeed.

    Prostate cancer is no fun. I've dealt with it - had my prostate removed a couple years ago. Still dealing with after affects, but the cancer was contained and all screens since have shown non-detectable levels.

    Public service announcement: Don't neglect the screening. After affects can be dealt with; PC, though usually slow-growing, is nasty.
    My father's prostate cancer was genetic -- a defective gene, CHK2, triggered it. It was Gleason 9 -- and of the two Gleason 9 variants, it was the more virulent one. The problem was we didn't know this when my father was initially diagnosed some six years ago. He chose radiation over removal. It was only when he came out of remission last fall that we knew the animal we were dealing with, and maybe a different decision should have been made when he was first diagnosed. Hindsight is always 20/20 though. Towards the end, his PSA level was over 5,000 --even after chemo treatments. It was like trying to stop a runaway train. Like I said in my initial post -- it was astonishing how quickly things unraveled.

    I had a genetic screening, and fortunately, I do not possess the CHK2 gene defect. Even so, I still have regular PSA tests. They have been hovering around 0.5 or 0.6 for quite some time.

    Thank you for all your expressions of support.

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    Moderator Mickey Richaud's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Glad you're on top of it. I had no warning whatsoever - only a rising PSA level over several years. Mine only reached 7 or so, but a biopsy showed a couple of questionable areas, and a different test was more definitive. Post-op biopsy showed the gland was 35% involved, but all internal; none on the periphery.

    No history of it in my family that I was aware of. Mine was caught early, and I had other treatment choices; but decided to have it removed. As you said, 20/20 hindsight comes into play, but overall I'm thankful. Still doing regular PSA tests, just in case.
    "There are three kinds of men. One who learns by readin'. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on that electric fence for themselves." Will Rogers
    Mickey Richaud - '73 MGB, '69 MGB GT/V6 (both SOLD! ); Victor TF 1800; '03 Jaguar XK8
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    Great Pumpkin NutmegCT's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    As said, getting that PSA test regularly should be a top priority; it's a simple blood test, and results should always be discussed with your doctor(s). Sure glad we caught my rising PSA levels back in 2009 and 10, and had the brachytherapy in early 2010. Since then, PSA has been so low it's almost un-detectable.

    Tom M.
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    Current: 1953 MG TD27318.

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    Darth Vader Bayless's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Sorry for your loss. I lost mine 16 years ago and still miss him and his advice. A dear friend observed at the time, "No matter how old you get, you're never quite ready to become an orphan."
    Was Man nicht im Kopf hat muss Man in den Beinen haben
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    Yoda HealeyRick's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Sounds like you had a Dad to be proud of. Condolences.
    Rick

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    Darth Vader judow's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    My sincere condolences. No words can undo what you are feeling but know that we all have a tear in our heart for you and your family.
    Proud Caregiver to:

    Agatha A Healey & Onslow A Jaguar

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    Moderator drooartz's Avatar
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Very sorry to hear the news.
    Drew Frink
    '59 RHD Frogeye Sprite - "Penny" sleeping for now
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    Yoda
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    Re: My Father Passed

    Sorry for your loss. He sounded like a great guy.

    My Dad passed over 20 years ago. I still have some of his tools and use them from time to time. Always bring back memories of working on things with him. I do wish I had asked more questions about his side of the family or paid better attention if he had told me stuff about them.

    If you are lucky enough to still have your Dad around ask questions about the family. Better yet get him to record his thoughts and memories on tape or video.

    David
    TR3A TS75524L

  20. #20
    Obi Wan
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    Re: My Father Passed

    My father wrote an autobiography from his birth until around 2006 that came to more than 150 pages. -- I'm so glad he did it. There were stories in there that we never knew, as well as stories of his father that we were not aware of. I knew of its existence, but didn't start reading it until he passed.

    Going through his computer, I found that he journalized his first bout with prostate cancer six years ago. In the document, it said that at his age, he was not a candidate to have the prostate removed. That does give me some peace of mind, as we thought that maybe he should have had it removed upon the initial diagnosis. We now know that wasn't possible.

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