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jaybird
08-02-2006, 10:51 PM
I have a dog & I was buying a large bag of Beneful at Target and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog (???)

I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I woke up in intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with bits of the dogfood and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete, so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now wrapped up in my story. She looked horrified and asked if I'd been poisoned. I told her no...I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt and a car hit me.

RomanH
08-02-2006, 11:10 PM
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VitSport6
08-02-2006, 11:49 PM
AWESOME!!!
I to have a dog /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/hammer.gif

michalotti_tr
08-03-2006, 07:29 AM
ROFLMAO /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif

Jaybird, you are one naughty girl!

ecurie_ecosse
08-03-2006, 08:50 AM
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/iagree.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif
Jaybird is all of that!! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/devilgrin.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/jester.gif
A good laugh a day keeps the medics at bay.Keep up the good work Jaybird. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/thumbsup.gif

Stuart. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cheers.gif

vping
08-03-2006, 09:32 AM
That's funny! My wife will like it.

GB1
08-03-2006, 09:38 AM
Very funny J /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/thumbsup.gif

Two chihuahua's here. Once a kid asked me if they were robots.

Of course I replied yes, have your Mommie get you one at ToysRUs.

DrEntropy
08-03-2006, 10:05 AM
No dog, three felines... kinda had a similar experience: checkout at grocery store with a 12-pack of canned catfood, a case of beer and two bags of tortilla chips... check-out girl commented that I must have a hungry cat. Well... "actually we're having some friends over for a get-together. The catfood is as good as goose liver, and they've never been able to tell the difference. Wanna come?" she blanched and declined. Others who'd overheard were snickering.

kennypinkerton
08-03-2006, 11:39 AM
Very funny Jaybird - I haven't stopped laughing yet! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif

Cat food Patte - love it Doc!

William
08-03-2006, 12:15 PM
Why yes, yes we do. http://img390.imageshack.us/img390/9344/schnozoi7.th.jpg (http://img390.imageshack.us/my.php?image=schnozoi7.jpg)

I believe Charlie took this one himself.

-Wm.

JamesWilson
08-04-2006, 06:08 AM
Sounds good... and they're crunchy and good for your teeth

I won't ask if they make your coat nice and shiney.... /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/devilgrin.gif


I've a Black Labrador.
http://healeyjournal.tripod.com/images/dokusavatar.jpg

mailbox
08-04-2006, 10:07 PM
/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif
Should have finished the story with "Here's your sign."

swift6
08-05-2006, 11:38 AM
That is surely a 'here's your sign' moment.

anthony7777
08-06-2006, 10:55 AM
jaybird,i dont have a dog, have a cat,but your story well that was the best! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif

R6MGS
08-06-2006, 05:47 PM
lol...great story.

My wife just bought a dog(today actually)....A chihuahua(sp?) anyway I am not an animal person at all, so this is gunna be interesting.

Nunyas
08-06-2006, 05:50 PM
you should teach him to say, "Quiero Taco Bell!"

Phireman
08-12-2006, 09:16 PM
Isaak & Zimmer say hey.

Isaak love to ride in the Midget.